Aquaria Loredo
Interdisciplinary Writing
Reilly
“Superwoman or Super Sized Expectations of Society”
What is the definition of a “Superwoman?” A Superwoman is defined as a woman with exceptional strength or ability. A woman who successfully manages a home, brings up children, and has a full-time career is an example of a Superwoman. Now, to the average person, a Superwoman may be a comic book character; but I will argue that the Superwoman of 2014 is much more than that. She is a person; she can be single or married, with 5 children or one. She is real with real expectations. There has always been a “Superwoman,” whether in the 1950’s or today--and I want to explore how she has evolved and the obstacles that she faces.
In the 1950’s, being a mommy and wife was something that young women aspired to become. Young women were schooled on how to act, talk, walk, and just carry themselves overall. They were taught how to cook and how to care for their husbands. Continuing education with the goal of becoming part of the working class was not really an option that was encouraged. Society predicted what courses female students were encouraged to take. Many young women either did not pursue college or wound up leaving college once they married because, per media outlets, this was what they were “supposed” to do--get married. Fast-forward to more than 50 years later and some things really have not changed. Women are still expected to be the June Cleavers in a Rosanne Arnold world. Women who are mothers and who choose, or maybe don’t choose but have to work, are not given enough credit. There are women working full-time jobs, coming home and taking over full-time mommy duties, as well as making time for wifely duties. Just writing about it becomes overwhelming.
Statistics involving women and the workforce in the 1950’s show that the workforce changed beginning with men returning from the war and taking back jobs that they had left. However, there were women that remained employed. As the men returned, women became wives and mothers, and they found themselves taking care of their home, their family, and their jobs. Lynn White, the Mills College President, states that “the curriculum for female students should prepare women to foster the intellectual and emotional life of her family and community” (Educating Our Daughters). It was assumed that women found “fulfillment” in baking and ironing. Print advertisements were directed at women showing a woman in the kitchen, surrounded by children, serving dinner, and smiling through it all. There was even an ad with a Hoover vacuum under the Christmas tree for the woman, with the words “Christmas morning she’ll be happier with a Hoover.”
As mentioned, looking 50 years later, according to the United States Department of Labor, in 2010, 72 million of the 123 million women aged 16 years and older were part of the labor force. This accounts for 58.6 percent of women. Still, much of what society expects from a woman still has not changed. For some reason, women are still seen as the caregivers and cooks, and all while 73 percent of the women in the workforce are working full-time jobs. According to Forbes, 71 percent of women who do work also have children under the age of 18. Expectations of mothers in the labor force can cause problems. This Blog will touch on some of the issues that the “Superwoman” of 2014 faces, such as, performance in the workplace, duties as a mother, duties as a wife, and duties to herself.
Being a woman in the workplace is a tough job in itself with current issues such as gender inequality and sexual harassment. But when a young woman tries to balance work and family, issues can arise. While job performance is something that can determine your future within a company, it often suffers when your responsibilities as a mother get in the way. A study conducted in 2007 compared undergraduates and actual employers and found that “mothers were often more likely than non-mothers to be regarded as less competent and poorly motivated to succeed.” Yet, fathers tended to be treated more favorably than non-fathers in the workplace. Evidence of treatment is shown in the form of higher starting salaries and being held to lower performance standards for men who are parents than those who are non-parents.
Balancing motherhood life is a twenty-four hour a day job, seven days a week, with no pay, and the only benefit being the success of your child after all you have taught him/her. The poem by William Wallace says it perfectly, “the hand that rocks the cradle is the hand that rules the world.” Mothers are the primary caregivers of the children, thus leaving them with an overwhelming sense of responsibility. One of many mother’s’ roles is to bring structure to the family unit. There are fifty-two job titles that a mother can hold on any given day according to “LifeWithoutPink.Com”. A couple of examples are: CEO of the Household, Personal Chef, Taxi Driver, Housekeeper, Family Therapist, Finance Manager, etc. These roles are very tiring, yet need to be filled. Society has a funny way of making women feel as though they should want to stay home with their kids and raise them until they are old enough and then, at that time women can go back to work.
At the same time that society is making women feel like they should be the doting mothers, it is also making everyone feel that they need more money. So, what happens when the woman is the only one working, all while juggling the doting mommy role? Society says “yes, dote on your children.” However, how can you be the mommy that society expects when you can only do so for an hour or half an hour because the job that is making you all of the money that society is saying you need is calling for you and relying on you to show up? A mother’s role is to take care of her children and nurture them back to health while they are sick. This brings about another issue with the working mother and what she faces. While reports show that a mother’s ability and will to work can improve the health of her child by making money that in turn permits a healthier lifestyle for her family, it can also have negative effects. According to Research Activities, February 2012, children of working mothers are approximately 200 percent more likely to have been hospitalized overnight than those with stay-at-home mothers. This is an issue when trying to balance work and motherhood because it leads to calling in sick due to lack of sleep from hospital visits, leading to poor work performance.
Now, if you are married, then you have obligations as a wife that you must meet as well. So far we have career, mother, and now wife that you must juggle. This is far from a joke when these women are referred to as “Superwomen.” So, what does society expect from a married woman? Gender roles have been a huge part of the way we live and they predict a lot of what a husband expects from his wife. While we would like to think that both men and women split the housework, the fact remains that even in the 20th century, these gender roles still seem to remain intact. A report from the Bureau of Labor and Statistics shows that on an average day, the rates for men and women doing household activities such as lawn and finances for the home are different. Men spend 65 percent of their time helping out while women spend 83 percent of their time helping. Laundry and cleaning is completed by women 48 percent of the time and by men 19 percent of the time. The difference reflects the expectations from husbands of their wives.
How does all of the pressure of having the career, raising the children, and doing the wifely duties weigh on the shoulders of women? What negative effects can be associated with all this pressure that may affect their husbands in a negative way? It can be said that a decrease in sex drive or inability to orgasm is one effect. Husbands expect their wives to submit to them, which is yet another role a woman must fulfill to be a “perfect wife.” However, due to the overwhelming amount of responsibility, the sex drives of these wives are plummeting. Ten percent, one in ten women, admitted losing interest in sex for at least 6 out of 12 months in the past year. Four percent of women named “inability to orgasm” as the next major problem. This is another issue that the modern day “Superwoman” faces. Stress alone is enough to make anyone sick. Stress is something that many “Superwomen” find themselves battling. Another issue is the depression that can accompany the stress. On the flip side, there are also arguments being made in which employment is said to provide both psychological and social benefits to women via increased interaction with adults.
Lastly, what happens to the happiness women find within themselves by just being themselves? As careers are started, marriages are created, children are born, and family life is on overdrive, they seem to forget about themselves and what made them happy before the career, before the wedding, and before the birth of any children. Women work so hard to contribute financially and emotionally to their family that they sometimes put their own dreams and hobbies on the back burner. They lose focus on what is important to them such as school, volunteer work, or hobbies. The “Superwomen” of 2014 need to relax and ask for help. If help is available, they should take and run with it. If they learn to delegate some responsibility to others and work on learning how to say “No,” it is likely that they will relieve some part of the stress that they carry. A study conducted by Dr. Ellen Kossek and colleagues at MSU found that employees who try to multi-task both work and family time are likely to be the most stressed. There needs to be a clear boundary dividing the two.
In conclusion, I believe that being a “Superwoman” is something that women tend to feel obligated to live up to--my experience as a “superwoman” confirms it. I have been stressed out, I have been the woman who forgets about her own happiness, and I have also been the woman who has made it through it all; stronger and happier. However, there are many women who don’t. There are many women sitting in front of a television, watching cartoons while folding the laundry, waiting for the oven timer to go off, all while wishing they were in bed already because of how tired they are from working all day. They don’t ask for help; they try to do it all. We need to relax and take the help when it is offered. Because remember, “the hand that rocks the cradle, is the hand that rules the world.”
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